Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Oooh sooo sticky sweet and better than cupcakes....
So, for those of you who know me, I struggle with the average momma struggle. In this state especially, it seems that if you are not careful, you just might become a clone. Now don't get me wrong, there are a lot of women that I might like to be cloned after, but I do relish my individuality. I can hear you thinking..."What is she talking about?!" Well, I mean, the topical things like: I like my hairstyle to be different than everyone else's, my music, my clothes (don't laugh, I know that those of you who know me know that I only wear jeans and T shirts- but it is MY style), etc...etc. But you have to admit it...birds of a feather DO flock together...and well...I like to be the big Dodo on the power line amongst all the cute little finches. (I know I should probably delete that ramble, but it does pertain to what I am really blogging about).
What am I really blogging about? Well, I wasn't much of a dancer growing up. I preferred sporty type activities and singing at the top of my lungs. So when my oldest daughter, Sterling, started dance (because all of my friends signed their daughters up) , many years ago, and wasn't immediately the Prima Ballerina...I...alas...pulled her out and signed her up for soccer. I think I was translating my own insecurities about dancing to my daughter. To be quite honest, I am not even sure if she was enjoying it- I just knew that I wasn't. I was too worried about everyone else - and I didn't want her to be embarrassed. Unfortunately, at the time, ballet was lost on me. Sterling has participated in many other activities, prompted by what everyone else's daughters were doing, but I did finally get a clue, and let her do what she wanted to do. As I have tried to do with the rest of my children.
Sooo..to get on with it..
Recently I signed my two younger daughters, Ruby and Bridget up for ballet. But I was so proud of myself so many years later, for even though my little girls may not have been the Prima Ballerinas of their classes...this time I did not care. I found myself starting to question near the end of the season as the program drew near, how important is it that I pay all of this money for classes, costumes,tickets and programs? They are only four and three...what exactly am I trying to achieve here with them?
Well, last night was the epitome of "What am I trying to achieve with them?". Bridget's dance performance was last night (Ruby's is Wednesday). They dance at The Children's Ballet Theatre and the program was at the Marriot Center for Dance. With grandparents in tow we all watched the most beautiful display of children's spirit. And as I watched my darling 2 foot tall Prima Ballerina pirouette across that stage (with her fingers in her mouth) I understood exactly what I was trying to achieve. Joy...joyful experiences...life. It doesn't matter what everyone else is doing...my girls may not become the best dancers...but if they have joy doing it then well done! So a public apology to Sterling, sorry I didn't get it then, but I get it now. And hopefully you wont take me on the Oprah show when you grow up claiming "My mother ruined my life because I can't dance!" And I am hoping all of the wonderful things you have achieved since will suffice.
So last night was so sweet, a perfect end to a good experience. And Bridget, she hasn't taken her ballet slippers off yet....